Overdue Hump Day Blog Whoring - Double Whammy

Alright, so I missed this Wednesday and last Wednesday, but now I have TWO things to whore to you this week, so I'm making up for it, 'kay? And they're both super awesome, so don't hate me or nuffin'.

First up are the KoverBoyz. One of my favorite things to do is sit on youtube and find people doing covers of songs I like. Most of them are terrible, some are funny, and sometimes I'm blown away. And so it was that I discovered these dudes. They pick songs that you wouldn't necessarily expect two guys to cover, and they don't cover them as a joke - sure they have fun, but they're seriously good quality, and respectful to the originals. I shall post my favorite:

This is one of my faves, but their covers of Tik Tok by Ke$ha and Alejandro by Lady GaGa is are also awesome. SERIOUSLY check 'em out and give 'em some love. Any subscribers I can get them will make me happy. Josh - who plays the guitar - also has a guitar tutorial channel, so check that out too, it's very good. They have other little homes on the web, but all those details are on the profile. Go look now, yeah?

Secondly! My friend AMY!!! She's a lovely, delightful lady, and she's recently started a blog which has a truly inspired idea. She's going back to all the things she decided she hated when she was a child and giving them the benefit of the doubt and re-evaluating as an adult. For real... this is the stuff award-winning sit-coms are based on. First up was peanut-related foods. Peanut butter, peanut candy bars, satay. Ohmygoodness, you have no idea how hilarious it was to follow her doing this. She has a poll for what's up next, so go read up on the Peanut Capers and then vote for the next thing at Amy Tries Again.

A-woooo! Two videos! I must love you or summat. So, there, I've made up for my two missed Hump Day Blog Whoring installments. Hey, life gets in the way, y'all.

Keep watching this space for some amusing tales of my workplace. Love your face (which I can't see, so take it on faith).

- Raynie

My Pussy Is Hanging Out.

Yeah, so, Hump Day Blog Whoring will be postponed until tomorrow. So it will be Post-Hump Day Blog Whoring. Post-coitus? Unsavory!

In the meantime, enjoy this video of the illustrious Ms. Spears proclaiming the freedom of her kitty-kat.

Stuff Panda Adores

Ladies, gentlemen and kittens, welcome to the very first installment of SPA - Stuff Panda Adores. SPA will be my weekly (or fortnightly, I'm not very good with time constraints) routine where I shall post a list of things that are currently making me squeal with delight, and hopefully will illicit the same response from you, dear readers, or at least inspire you to seek out your own stuff to adore. SO HERE GOES:

This week I am ♥'ing all over the faces of Miss Dita Von Teese (and her love for Diorific lipstick #13, such a gorgeous red). She inspires me to embrace femininity and to look polished at all times:

The beautiful Gemma Arterton, particularly for her role in St Trinians, which I've only recently seen - my mother bought it for me the other day for 5 bucks because, "You look like the girl on the cover!" I love my mum.

While these two lovely minxes are topping the list this week, other notable entries include:

• The rain. I love you rain, please stick around for a morning where I can sleep in.
• My crazy kitten Penny, who is currently trying to scale the walls in hot pursuit of a moth.
• Dresses with tulle skirts and multitudes of girly adornments - bows, ruffles, lace... etc.
• Tulle in general.
• Lush for creating bath bombs that fill my house with the scent of creaming soda and turn my bath blue. And for hiring brilliant staff who plan zombie contigency plans and poker girls nights with me.
• Apocalyptica and their Metallica covers. On cellos. CELLOS. Check them out.
  
• The True Blood books.
• The excitement of getting my next tattoo on March 17. *implode*
• Gatsby and our plans to dominate the world with our adorable merchandise.
• My boyfriend for whisking me off to the beach for Valentine's and bringing me home frozen yoghurt because it was all I felt like eating in this crazy heat.
• Roses. Anything with roses. I have gone rose-crazy. I especially love the giant rose rings from Sportsgirl.

Tell me something you're in love with right now! Are you batty for bubble tea or head over heels in love with headbands? Spill. :D

Love love love.

Panda xx

Stuff I Saw & What I Thought Of It

I saw two films today, and one was vastly better than the other, though you could fairly say they're apples and oranges. But, the lesser of the two certainly wasn't bad.

Daybreakers - Starring: Ethan Hawke, Sam Neill, Claudia Karvan, Willem Dafoe, Isabella Lucas


I saw this at the cinemas with Candice and I was unsure what to expect. It's a U.S. - Australian co-production, and Australian films so often fail miserably, especially genre pieces (my opinion, being honest, y'all). But, I get pretty stoked when an Australian movie isn't a miserable piece of shit (Wolf Creek? AWESOME.) so I wanted to give it a chance.

For those of you who haven't heard of it, it's a near-future vampire film, set in America but made in Australia. Basically, humans have nearly died out, and this is a problem for vampires for obvious reasons.

I was pleasantly surprised. It wasn't without it's flaws, but it managed to overcome them. Flaws first. Ethan Hawke looked tired and bored, but it kinda suited the role; Willem Dafoe's character was totally out of place in the movie and had an actor with less innate awesomeness been cast it would have been horribly, horribly wrong. Isabella Lucas still can't act, but she's pretty, and that's all she really needed to do. Jay Laga'aia is such a dude and ought to have been a much bigger character. Claudia Karvan and Sam Neill... They're both incredible, and Sam Neill plays a sufficiently suave and charismatic baddie, but Claudia was criminally underused. She made her underwritten role interesting, and she was engaging to watch. Towards the end it seemed they'd run out of things to do with her but kept her onscreen anyway. And lastly, it was freakin' awesome seeing parts of Brisbane in the film. Woo! So nice to -not- see New York for once. But when the plot took to the countryside it was so blatantly the Australian countryside that it was way to jarring and weird. Perhaps to an American audience it would go unnoticed, but to me it was really off-putting and completely brought me out of the setting. Make us believe it's America, or don't bother, kthnx.

Beyond this stuff, it suffered a few of the usual things that horror flicks often do; some characters appear only to die, and so it's hard to give two turds about 'em. There were some truly stupid scares. One involves a bat (yup) suddenly flying across the screen, but it was a cheap fright and laughable after the fact. And by the end it all resorted to a cheap hack-n-slash resolution, which I enjoyed but didn't do the thoughtful beginning complete justice.

Okay, okay, so now you're thinking "I thought you said you liked it? Was there -anything- good about it?" And yes, there was. All the lame-o stuff can be forgiven because it's so stylishly done, and praise-baby-jebus, none of the vampires sparkle (although the main character's name is Edward, and he's equally sad and mopey). In fact there was a cute bit where they did the whole no-reflection thing, but for the most part, it didn't build any mythology beyond the whole "we're dead and we drink blood and sun is bad" deal.

I would go so far as to say that the opening scene was actually quite poignant, and the introduction was thoughtful and interesting. The premise isn't subtle in its allegory, but it was nice to finally have a vampire story that isn't schmaltzy, tweeny or horn-baggy (there were lots of titties, but not the sexy kind). The narrative lost it's thoughtfulness towards the end, but the action is so nicely done that I was totally okay with that. And, the music was incredible. Seriously, my favorite things about this entire film were Claudia Karvan and the score.

I was unsure when I left the cinema whether I enjoyed it so much because it was that great, or because I didn't really expect much of it, and the more I ponder it, the gloss wears off and the more I think "yeah, I'm not really wetting myself anymore". That said, it's perfectly competent and enjoyable, and if not worth the cinema ticket (my ticket and a frozen cola was $21 and change! I miss my student card), definitely a DVD rental.

Adam - Starring: Hugh Dancy, Rose Byrne, Amy Irving, Peter Gallagher

Now, I admit, I downloaded this one. Now, before y'all reprimand me, let me explain myself. I saw the trailer for this a good while ago on Apple and I got that wonderful shivery feeling when you just know something is going to be special. And I waited... and waited... I don't know if never received a theatrical release in Lose-stralia, but I had my eye out and never found it showing. So then I was looking for it on DVD, and I've not yet found it. So I downloaded it, and I can assure you that I will be buying it first chance I get.

This movie is -magical-. I adored it from start to finish. It's a quiet little film and it just wandered into my heart, took a polite little seat in the corner and never left.

Adam tells the story of a young man with Asperger's Syndrome who begins a friendship with a woman who moves into his building. Hugh Dancy is absolutely understated and sensitive in his portrayal of Adam and avoids all the lovable-nutcase-by-numbers overacting that so many other actors would. Rose Byrne is enchanting in a completely effortless way as Beth. She's not ditzy or quirky just believably sweet. Neither of them try to orchestrate sympathy and the entire film is really quite sensitive and beautiful without being sentimental or schmaltzy.

My heart broke about a million times. I related to Adam so completely and I was touched by Beth's quiet, unsure bravery. And the soundtrack was equally beautiful and I downloaded it (from iTunes) immediately after. It seems these days Joshua Radin and The Weepies are on the mandatory checklist for indie film soundtracks - not that I'm complaining.

I really don't want to give too much away about this film. I just want you to go watch it. So, go watch it. Now. Go on.

Stuff I Want To See and Stuff I'll Probably Skip

A Single Man - I saw the trailer for this and felt like my brain had been fucked roughly with beautiful awesomeness and it's absolutely at the top-top-top of my "Wanna See" list. Point of interest: it's produced and directed by Tom Ford. Yup, -that- Tom Ford; the fashion designer who's as delicious as he is freakishly talented.

From Paris With Love - Oh, BOOOOO. This film looks like a steaming pile of crap. Jonathan Rhys Mayers is a delightful chappy, so that's a shame. Too bad that John Travolta decided to take a big filthy turd all over this film by trying too hard to be a dude and ending up looking like a complete and total tool. For serious, I thought to myself "Man, if J-Trav forces it any harder, he's going to end up with a distended and bleeding anus". Still, I'm basing this on the trailer, so I could be proven wrong, but I won't be spending money to find out.

Clash of the Titans - Sam Worthington. Greek gods. Nuff said, gimme my ticket.

The Wolfman - I -want- to be excited about this, but every time I think about Benicio Del Toro mackin' on Emily Blunt I vomit into my mouth a little. He's a dude, but Emily is a beautiful angel. A beautiful. Perfect. Angel. Even if I managed to get used to that image, he still looks totally out of place. I dunno, I still clinging to the possibility that it will be as awesome as I want it to be.

Alice In Wonderland - I guarantee you that after seeing this I will be squealing non-stop for an entire week at least.

Children Are Pets, Gays Are Paris Hilton & Pictures of Two Awesome Ladies

This week my faith in Australian politics was shattered and restored in one fell swoop, so I guess I'm really just back where I began. As you may be aware, altruistic surrogacy was made legal in Queensland... the last Australian state to do so. And this is a wonderful thing, because not only has it been legalized, but it's been legalized without amendments to exclude same-sex couples or single parents. I wanted to weight in on the topic, though I will never be able to talk politics with the same intelligence, humor, appeal or pure awesomeness of the likes of Rachel Maddow (who has nothing to do with this topic except that she's my favorite person in the world at the moment).

In and of itself, this is a great thing, I believe, but it was inevitable that this would spark controversy. Adding fuel to the fire was the opposition stating that they would whole-heartedly support the bill if it excluded same-sex couples and single parents, backed by many Christian and religious groups. Indeed, during the bill's debate the comments it elicited were completely laughable. One opposition member made a statement to the effect of gay couples viewing children as "pets" and status symbols, and that lesbians or single mothers could not possibly raise a son because they would not be able to take them into a male public bathroom. There was another suggestion that allowing surrogacy would result in another "Lost Generation" and a future reconciliation process when we realize the error of our evil left-wing ways.

It perplexes me that these are the arguments that surfaced. I was raised - very well and lovingly, I might add - by two parents, a man and a woman, and until I was old enough to go to a public bathroom myself, my mother took me into the women's bathroom or my father took me to the men's bathroom, and so it was for all the boys my age at shopping centers, cinemas, department stores, or any public place. Using a public bathroom was really not a serious component of my development, at least, not beyond the early realization that public bathrooms are revolting and that I should avoid using them at any cost (perhaps then it's a godsend that a lesbian couple's son would never be able to endure the horror...).The fact that the people who made these comments would perhaps be the first to throw their arms up about predators or pedophiles should the boy be taken into the men's bathroom anyway makes the statement even more amusing.

Further more, I seriously doubt that any couple or adult would be willing to go through the financial, emotional and legal hassles of arranging a surrogacy (or adoption or IVF for that matter) if they did not want to truly, desperately be parents and provide a loving home.  If the gays really wanted a fancy pet, wouldn't they just get, uh, I don't know... a... pet? Like a dog or something? And anyone under the illusion that surrogacy would be a completely unregulated process are insane. I also think they seem to miss the fact that quite often the surrogate mother is not the child's biological mother anyway. The fact that commercial surrogacy is still illegal means that the chance of the surrogate being a complete stranger who decides to lend out her womb is going to be pretty slim to none. So, who other than a family member or dear friend is likely to offer to carry your child without demands of recompense? Combine the likelihood that a) the child is biologically the commissioning parents' and b) the surrogate is a loved and trusted friend or family member and I'm left wondering how a second "Lost Generation" fits in there.

It all gives me a headache that these are the conclusions state politicians have drawn because these people are running this country. I'm by no means saying that if they disagree with this bill they're "rednecks" or "bigots", as they seem to have been labeled by the Labor party (which, mind you, are equally disappointing actions on their part). In fact, I have great respect for the Labor members who crossed the floor against the bill, for they did so without resorting to ignorant or inflammatory jibes, but merely stated it was a matter of conscience. It was an incredibly brave thing to do, as crossing the floor seems so frowned upon in Australian politics. And yet I can't help but be reminded of one of the best quips about people who oppose gay marriage - "If you don't like gay marriage, don't marry a gay". If you're against surrogacy, don't have someone else birth your baby.

Perhaps I'm naive, but at the end of the day, I understand that democracy is a case of "best for most, not for all". It's impossible to please everyone, but the government is there to represent the people and "the people" aren't going to agree on everything, so it can only do what they determine is best in response to what the majority demands. I think by now this should be a concept that Australian's can just accept with out Christians and conservatives being denounced as bigoted rednecks and without secular liberals labeled evil radicals.

In a podcast by the Gay Christian Network that I listened to a while ago, the founder, Justin Lee was speaking about gay marriage and he referred to an essay by C.S. Lewis which he'd written about divorce. Now, I haven't read this myself, so I'm open to corrections or additions for accuracy, but I'm sure I got the gist. He stated that as a Christian, he was opposed to divorce. But, it was not for Christians to deny the wider society access to divorce. Whether it was legal for the masses or not, Christians must defer to the morals of their faith within the broader laws of the country. And so it is with surrogacy.

Church and state are separate, and for very good reason, and this seems to be a point that Australia has such a struggle coming to terms with. I understand that our country has a strong Christian heritage, and these historical remnants are going to come up often such as the recitation of the Lord's prayer at the sitting of Parliament. But without this segregation, we would not have religious freedom and could we really then lay claim to being a "multicultural" nation? The point is, the law should not be determined by Christian morality or any other religious morality for that matter, but rather, should instead have a greater reach with a broader, secular morality. It is within this morality that individuals may apply their own religious or personal moral code, Christian or not, and I believe that the passing of the surrogacy bill - after all the bickering and name-calling is done - is a testament to this.

Hump Day Blog Whoring - Wendy Molyneux

Hump Day is here again, y'all! And for today's installment of Hump Day Blog Whoring, I have a cornucopia of funny amusement for you to go and follow obsessively.

I don't even know how I stumbled on Wendy Molyneux's blog Fake Interviews With Real Celebrities, but I found it, I loved it, and have since added her Tumbr and Twitter to my list of cool shiz to follow. And now, I'm making a gift of it to you. No need to thank me. It's just what I do.

Her droll observations on pop culture and everyday bizarreness have often made my day. I also managed to score a copy of her book "Everything Is Wrong With You" which is a parody of self-help books. I'm pretty sure a borderline retard such as Tom Cruise could successfully make fun of self-help books (credit where credit is due: "Psychology is a pseudo science" - Scientologist or comic genius?), let alone someone *actually* smart and funny like Wendy. I'm pretty sure this book will make me laugh hard enough to cough up an internal organ or three. Win for me! I'll keep you posted on the organ count once I've received it.

Wendy's blog - Fake Interviews With Real Celebrities

Her lastest article on McSweeney's

Her Tumblr

Her Twitter

The goal for next week is to actually make at least one blog entry between HDBW. Fun.

Hump Day Blog Whoring - Ouch My Face Hurts

Here it is, people. Hump Day.

And I can't tell you how glad I am this week is almost through. I'm so sick of this week. You ever meet those people who are so frustrating that you just want to punch them in the face? I deal with some of these people at work. Hell, they're so frustrating I'd punch myself in the face just to have a reason to get away from them.

I shan't get into it, because this place was never meant to be a forum for venting the trails and tribulations of my accidental career, but I shall ask you this:

How hard is it to grasp the concept of the "Subject" field of an email? Hmm? If I get one more email with the subject "Hi Raynor" followed by an email with text so broken and hackneyed I swear they typed it with their elbows I may burst into uncontrollable sobbing unleashed by my utter and total loss of hope for the future of humanity. And we all know what grown-man-tears are like. Uncomfortable...

But I shall bore you no more and instead shall present you the first installment of Hump Day Blog Whoring! Sheow!

This week, I'm whoring Ouch My Face Hurts by the lovely Ms. Maddy.

All you really need to know is that her slant on the world is always well observed and usually hilarious. The other thing that I love is that I disagree with her on a lot of things, like the entries in some of her Top 5 lists, but her critique of these things are too funny so I don't even care. For example, I enjoyed Avatar and X-Men Origins: Wolverine - hardly intellectual accomplishments for sure, but I was sufficiently entertained and I'm an X-Men fanboy - but her complaints were that beautiful bend of fair criticism and scathing humor. I could go further extolling the virtues of Ouch, but really, just go read it, mmkay?

Also, as I promised Maddy, here is a picture of me wearing my "I Have Two Fingers" shirt. If you don't get it, the answer is in her blog if you read far enough back. See? I've even given you incentive to go read it! It wouldn't be the same if I just told you. Something about teaching fish to eat for a man for a day or whatever.

By the way, I might be pretty close to legally retarded.... my webcam took this as a mirror image and I swear I flipped it about four times going "Is that the right way? Huh? No... I can read it both ways! Which way is the right fucking way!? Okay... breathe... Now, which side is my bed on...". Dickhead.

The PandaPie is Baked & Outta The Oven

Well, hello. Fancy meeting you here. PandaPie is pretty much on its feet now; brand spanking new layout, and I'm committed to posting more regularly. And Hump Day Blog Whoring will see it's first installment tomorrow. Are you so excited you could pee? Yeah you are! Don't lie, I can see the wet patch.

iPad - Because Apple is Awesome and Menstrual Jokes Are Funny

No, seriously, I just wanted to touch base on the whole topic of the imminent iPad. Terrible name, yes. And indeed, there seem to be more naysayers than yeasayers at this point, but I truly think the iPad is worth a second look. I've got to admit that I was originally disappointed, because I was expecting a tablet notebook, and the iPad clearly is not. But it stayed in my mind, niggling away...

The more I thought about it, the more I read about it, the more excited I got. I think Apple has undermined itself in terms of the hype in that people were expecting a tablet notebook, when really it seems that the iPad is perhaps more along the lines of being the missing link between smartphones, e-readers and notebooks; a kind of nebulous device category that has yet to be well defined.

Compared to notebooks, sure, its features are not nearly as robust or powerful. Compared to e-readers, it's on another level entirely in terms of its broad capabilities and applications. Compared to a smartphone, it provides a broader, more enriched experience, though it perhaps takes a few steps closer to being a domestic device and a few steps away from being a business tool. I get the impression that the iPad is aiming for somewhere in between these markets, where there's a big gap people probably haven't really thought about before. I think this is evidenced by its continuation of the existing App Store and the introduction of the iBookstore.

As with any piece of technology, it's well advised to be mindful of the cons, and iPad is not without them. I've got to say, as much as I'd like to ignore the fact that it doesn't have multi-tasking and doesn't have any usb outlets without the aid of a dock or dongle, or even a camera, it does bug me a bit. But bear with me Negative Nellies! I'm willing to look past that. The iPhone had plenty of detractors when the 2G version released, and all of these shortcomings have been addressed since (even the tiny things I didn't think mattered to me - who know how excited I was to be able to cut and past... Jesus wept).

Personally, I'm pretty stoked to have a glorified iPhone, as a hand-held media point and e-reader. Perhaps this might seem less exciting in America where e-readers are more common (I've never actually seen on in Australia, so it's more of an novelty to me). I really think when people stop comparing the iPad to a netbook and looking at it's potential as a domestic, multi-purpose appliance, then I think it could be a sleeper hit.

I'm not going to buy an iPad expecting it to replace my MacBook or desktop. Sure, as an artist, I'd love a true tablet computer but for the screen to be the size that I would want for art work the thing would be a monster and I can only see it being cumbersome and unmanageable. I'm going to buy an iPad because sometimes I don't want to sit at my desk to browse the net or listen to music - I scooch up on my bed or the couch and noodle about on my iPhone. Now, the thought of being able to do all this on a similar platform to the iPhone... but bigger... Add that to it being an e-reader... Can't you see the utter bliss in that? YEAH YOU DO.

But you don't have to take my word on how awesome the iPad is gonna be, take Stephen Fry's. You heard me. Stephen. Fry. Nuff said.