Wednesday, July 21, 2010


It really makes you think.

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Disney Pop-Tarts: Miley Vs. Selena

It's interesting to see how the stable of Disney pop-tarts tackle the tail-end of their adolescence both in their music and their image. Vanessa Hudgens seems to be focusing on films that gradually get more mature (I’m only really basing this on Band Slam and Beastly, I don’t pay her that much attention), perhaps in an effort to distance herself from her nudie-scandal. Hilary Duff... well... is she still alive? I’ve not heard anything about her since her parents divorced. Same for her horse-faced sister. 

But, Miley Cyrus and Selena Gomez are the interesting ones to me. When Miley decided to “grow up”, she makes rebellious songs, saucy videos, and wears less and less clothes. I think at one point she was wearing macrame. Huh. Don’t get me wrong, I completely adore her. I actually think of all the Disney pop-tarts she’s probably the most musically talented - neck and neck with Demi Lovato - and she’s still kept that goofball charm that made Hannah Montana such a guilty pleasure. I also admire and am completely fascinated by the fact that she’s openly Christian AND supports gay marriage. Who doesn’t love a Christian who hearts teh gayz? Kristen Chenoweth anyone? Plus, it also means that hoards of tweens who idolize Hannah Montana now heart teh gayz too, and that bodes well.
But still.. she’s wearing macrame now. See? This outfit is held together with some knots and a prayer. 

Then we have Selena Gomez who has come from out of nowhere to be my most beloved and adored Disney pop-tart. It seemed to me that for a long time she was overshadowed by the likes of Miley and Demi and the Jo Bros, and then somewhere along the line, there she was... Wizards of Waverly Place: The Movie became the second most viewed Disney Channel Original Movie, and her first album “Kiss & Tell” was really... not bad at all. She doesn’t have the vocal chops of Demi or Miley, but it has a pleasant texture and character, and the album - a somewhat par-for-the-course selection of teen pop-rock - played to her strengths. And then there was that song! Naturally completely caught my attention and infected my brain with its electro-synthy goodness. But where would she go next?

Well, unlike Miley, when Selena Gomez decided she wanted to “grow up”, instead of losing her pants and recording a precocious, skanky, rebellion tune a’la Can’t Be Tamed, she threw on some classy, tasteful frocks and put out a piece of glorious pop perfection. Taking inspiration from Naturally and running with it, Round and Round continues with the infectious dance/electro-pop sound. And I gotta say, this song is completely addictive, and the bridge into the chorus is utterly irresistible. UTTERLY irresistible. And now that she's BFF with the most wholesome of the wholesome Taylor Swift, I’m hoping like crazy and throwing salt over my shoulder that Selena breaks the so-called “Disney Curse”.

Monday, March 22, 2010

Something Is Rotten In The State Health Department (specifically, the level 3 bathroom...)

Dearest Service Centre,

I am writing to inform you that the toilet in the second stall from the entrance in the men's bathroom on level three appears to be blocked.

This afternoon I went to use the bathroom and lifted the lid to reveal a particularly nasty remnant. I flushed to save the unpleasant experience for others that might follow in my unfortunate steps only to watch with dread as the water (and its... occupants...) filled to the rim. To my most grateful relief, it did not overflow, nor did it empty however. I was advised that the Service Centre was the correct avenue to report this, and so, as much as I would like to spare you these most disagreeable details, I am dutifully and solemnly forwarding them to you - the esteemed caretakers of our fine building.

In spite of the insalubrious nature of my email, I wish you a wonderful afternoon.

Yours sincerely,

This really happened, and I really sent this email. Not that I think it's so crazy or unbelievable or anything, but just so you knew I wasn't Kthnx.

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Strangers Among Us, or: How I Handle Unsavory Facebook Friends

I openly admit that I'm a social networking whore. It should also be said that I'm not a terribly social person: I can't handle social groups larger than three or four people, and I don't feel a pressing need to have a hugely expansive circle of friends, so I wouldn't say my habit is to a point of ridiculous excess - Myspace has fallen to the wayside (alas!) so really it's just down to Facebook and Twitter. But I check them religiously. 
I have three iPhone apps to assist this: I have the standard Facebook app, I have Tweetie 2, and I have another app entirely that allows me to post updates to Facebook and Twitter simultaneously. Multiple times a day. And I love it. Yet this habitual pleasure of mine presents its cons and the greatest of these for me is the dreaded Friend Request. There are a few different kinds of these friend requests.
The first is the "Kosher Friend Request". This comes from someone you actually know and like and actually consider a friend, or at least a pleasant acquaintance. This doesn't present a problem; it's awesome. And it's how it should be. This category could be extended to those requests you receive from someone you perhaps haven't met in person, but you have a good friend in common, and you've spoken via a thread of comments on that person's wall. This should typically be accompanied by a message or some form of explanation "Oh, hey, I'm Cindy's friend and from that convo today you seemed cool." Totally fine.
But then the waters become muddy. The second kind is the "Unsolicited Friend Request". A friend request from someone you didn't even know existed until their smug little thumbnail appears in your notifications. Sure, you might have some friends in common, but this is likely to be merely a fruit of friend-whoring. Back in the days of Myspace and before people thought it might actually be a good idea to protect their privacy on Facebook, this might have been a sound transaction, but again, with explanation. "Your profile is awesome, and we love a lot of the same things...". That might have held some credence, but now that most people keep their stuff private, this doesn't happen anymore. They've just sent you a request, sight-unseen, no explanation. I could get irritated. I could be wierded out. But my reaction is far simpler. "Ignore". I don't know who this person is, so I don't waste much thought on the topic. I just deny the request and be done with it.
But then there's the dreaded "I-Forgot-That-I-Knew-You-Or-I'd-Have-Blocked-You-By-Now Friend Request". This is from someone you know, and wish you didn't. Perhaps they're from high school, or a loser friend of a sibling or family member, or a conquest you'd perhaps rather forget, or perhaps they're from your social circle but you just plain, straight out don't like them. These are the ones that cause me the most stress, and I get cross with them that they've put me in this position. Uh, dude... I didn't like you in high school, I don't like you now. Didn't you beat me up once? Yeah. Why are you friend requesting me? For serious?
Now, I don't want to seem like a total nasty pube who hates everyone. It's not the case at all. But Facebook - to me at least, and I'm sure many others - is a private space. I don't want any old person seeing my pictures and conversations and whiny updates. I don't want some dude I went on a really awkward date with to be privy to my flirty banter with more eligible peeps or my unflattering pictures. Pragmatically, my mind tells me I have every right to deny and accept friend requests as I please. But I still stress about it, especially if we have common friends - real or Facebook. I'll leave that request sitting there for weeks. 
My old strategy was to add them and then surreptitiously delete them a month or two later. It generally seemed to go unnoticed, because let's face, half of these people barely say more than a word to you once they've added you anyhow; and the chances are they've been whoring themselves all over Facebook with a friend count in the thousands to match so the likelihood that you even show up in their feed is slim to none. But I came to the conclusion this is kinda douchey. My current policy is to let it sit there for a while and then ignore the request.
It's completely retarded and irrational, but I feel like if I let it sit there for a while, it gives the impression that I've put time into considering my decision. I've not just dismissed them out of hand and junked the request straight up. It makes me feel less... cruel? This doesn't always work. I had one guy who I'd met once or twice and we had a mutual friend. Every time we both commented on this mutual friend's updates, I got a friend request. I'd leave it for a bit then ignore it. The next time we both commented, another request and another rejection. This cycle must have repeated itself no less than five times, before I get a message asking if he'd done anything wrong. What are you supposed to answer to that? What did you do wrong? You friend requested me four hundred times and didn't get the hint, that's what! I replied that there was no bad blood but rather I just kept FB for my close friends. Perhaps a bit of a white lie, but definitely held some truthiness.
So perhaps it makes me a complete dick, but I, for one, am an advocate for the right to deny friend requests. Just ask yourself if you would invite this person into your home without feeling like you need to keep an eye on them. Would you admit your secret passion for Gilmore Girls to them? Would you want this individual to be privy to all your personal dealings, flirting, poor-taste jokes, candid party snaps, so on and so forth? If you get an uneasy feeling even before you've answered these questions, press the ignore button. Just. Do. It. You'll be better for it.

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Kerli - Walking on Air

Some candy for your eye and earparts. If you can watch this and not OMG DIE, there is something seriously, seriously wrong with you.

Pan xx

Friday, February 26, 2010

Overdue Hump Day Blog Whoring - Double Whammy

Alright, so I missed this Wednesday and last Wednesday, but now I have TWO things to whore to you this week, so I'm making up for it, 'kay? And they're both super awesome, so don't hate me or nuffin'.

First up are the KoverBoyz. One of my favorite things to do is sit on youtube and find people doing covers of songs I like. Most of them are terrible, some are funny, and sometimes I'm blown away. And so it was that I discovered these dudes. They pick songs that you wouldn't necessarily expect two guys to cover, and they don't cover them as a joke - sure they have fun, but they're seriously good quality, and respectful to the originals. I shall post my favorite:

This is one of my faves, but their covers of Tik Tok by Ke$ha and Alejandro by Lady GaGa is are also awesome. SERIOUSLY check 'em out and give 'em some love. Any subscribers I can get them will make me happy. Josh - who plays the guitar - also has a guitar tutorial channel, so check that out too, it's very good. They have other little homes on the web, but all those details are on the profile. Go look now, yeah?

Secondly! My friend AMY!!! She's a lovely, delightful lady, and she's recently started a blog which has a truly inspired idea. She's going back to all the things she decided she hated when she was a child and giving them the benefit of the doubt and re-evaluating as an adult. For real... this is the stuff award-winning sit-coms are based on. First up was peanut-related foods. Peanut butter, peanut candy bars, satay. Ohmygoodness, you have no idea how hilarious it was to follow her doing this. She has a poll for what's up next, so go read up on the Peanut Capers and then vote for the next thing at Amy Tries Again.

A-woooo! Two videos! I must love you or summat. So, there, I've made up for my two missed Hump Day Blog Whoring installments. Hey, life gets in the way, y'all.

Keep watching this space for some amusing tales of my workplace. Love your face (which I can't see, so take it on faith).

- Raynie

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

My Pussy Is Hanging Out.

Yeah, so, Hump Day Blog Whoring will be postponed until tomorrow. So it will be Post-Hump Day Blog Whoring. Post-coitus? Unsavory!

In the meantime, enjoy this video of the illustrious Ms. Spears proclaiming the freedom of her kitty-kat.